Quickie with Rin: Why do I feel sad after sex?

Quickie With Rin is a new series where we share our quick tips, insight and experiences on our Instagram @shyandcurious_com.


If you have the tendency to feel a little blue after sex, even if you had an amazing time… you’re not alone! It’s actually pretty common to feel sad or anxious after a sexual encounter due to “The Drop”.

“The Drop” or specifically known as the “Sub-Drop” within the kink community, refers to an emotional and physical low once experiences after a sexual session/scene. When your body releases all the feel-good chemicals like endorphins, oxytocin, dopamine, and serotonin during an encounter, it takes some time for your body to readjust and go back to “normal”. Coupled with an emotional high during intimate bonding, calibrating back to neutral may feel like a ‘Low’ or being spacey and lost in your own world.

You may experience the effects of the Drop from as soon as you climax, to a few hours and even days. It may also affect others in different ways like being anxious, tired, guilty, changes in eating and trouble concentrating. Why is this important to know? So you understand your body and emotions better after sex!

If you’re feeling blue and guilty after sex, it may not necessarily be tied to how you’re feeling about your partner and the encounter. It’s a natural biological reaction after achieving such a high.

That’s why we’re definitely fans of aftercare, whether from your partner or yourself! Take it easy on yourself for the next few days and then once your body has recalibrated back to normal, then take the the time to process your emotions and thoughts about the encounter and your partner.